According to research, the simple answer here is YES. Counseling works. Although, to ask this question at all, we need to ask ourselves “what are we expecting it to succeed at?”

If you are expecting a therapist to provide life advice and tell you if you need to get a divorce or not, then no, it doesn’t work. If you are expecting therapy to make you happy just because you showed up, then no, it doesn’t work. If your goal is to feel better by next weekend then it won’t succeed at that, either. So, if therapy can’t do any of these things, what can it do? Why go at all?

Although the hopes just mentioned above are relatable and completely valid to want, a simple, quick answer is simply not realistic. However, that doesn’t mean that you won’t ever get these desires met. There are multiple goals therapy is proven to succeed at, but it requires your cooperation and patience to achieve them.

Therapy Reduces Negative Symptoms

Therapy is proven to be helpful in reducing negative mood, negative thoughts, and harmful behaviors.

Some people who seek counseling are suffering from depressive or anxious symptoms or over-powering emotional episodes. Others may be experiencing loneliness, confusion, or insecurity. Whatever the negative symptom is, therapy aims to understand it and soothe it.

Therapy Helps Us Reach Our Goals

Sometimes, even if we know what would make us happy in life, it is extremely difficult to take that first step. There are many obstacles that may hold us back, like shame, guilt, or low self-esteem. However, when the ball gets rolling, so many other things come our way, too.

Gaining confidence and empathy for yourself may encourage you to apply for that job or go back to school, move to a new place, or even reach out to a friend.

Therapy Often Results in Insight

Looking at a situation from a new angle may sometimes be all we need to find the motivation for change. Although therapists are not there to provide advice, what they are there for is to talk you through your own values and help you become conscious of your own wants and needs. If those things can become organized, making decisions can become much easier!

Therapy Helps Us Accept Our Own Pain

Not every problem can be solved, such as the grief of losing someone important to you, or finding out you have an illness. Usually pain is a messenger that says we need to take action to make it stop, but in some cases, we have to grieve over what we don’t have control over. Sitting in painful feelings is not easy, but by honoring them we can allow them to pass through and be an opportunity for self-nurture. The more we nurture ourselves, the easier it is to nurture others, too! Sometimes we simply are not ready or able to work on change before allowing this process of acceptance to take place.

So What Does it Take to “Do the Work?”

Therapists are there to walk alongside you as you navigate your own feelings of desire for change and the comfort of staying the same. They cannot persuade you to let something go in order to process an emotion or make healthier choices. You have to decide that for yourself.

The hardest part of pursuing a mental health goal is choosing to let go of something that feels comfortable or soothing to you that may be causing harm. And that may be the negative symptom in itself! Every emotion has its place, and they are good in the correct context, but when they seep into other contexts, you as the client will have to decide that what you want to achieve is greater than the comfort of that symptom. It takes bravery and humility to work towards better mental health. It can be scary. However, you’re not alone, and all steps can be made smaller and more manageable.

The therapist is there to help guide you to empirically supported methods of reaching your goal, and to create a treatment plan that feels reachable and plays on your strengths.

So, what do you have to do?

1. Attend your sessions. Many highly treatable mental health issues do not get reduced because of low attendance. If you want to see results you will have to be willing to sacrifice some time.
2. Be honest. Lying out of fear of rejection is a valid feeling, but all it does is keep you where you’re at. Your goals can’t be reached if you can’t be honest with yourself and your therapist. If you feel like you don’t trust your therapist, find another one, because it is not going to work out.
3. Set a goal and keep it in sight. Be aware of what you want and remember that you are trying to get there because you care a lot about it.
4. Do your best to “do the homework” if it is assigned to you. Counseling homework is usually pretty quick and simple. It may be to think about a question, or to practice correcting a thought, or doing breathing exercises once a day. Whatever it is, this goal will be something you and your therapist collaborate on. This means, if it sounds unhelpful or too hard then you can say so, and homework can be edited to be something that fits you better. You don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for or you feel isn’t in line with your goals.
5. Keep an open mind and “trust the process”. Yes, if I haven’t made it clear by now, therapy is a process. It takes weeks for your brain to make new neural pathways, and longer for them to become second nature. You need time for those biological things to happen. Be patient with these physical limitations!

Hopefully this information is helpful in considering if therapy is something you need right now. If it is, and you live in Georgia, reach out!